See This?

This artist, Ben Heine, popped up on my email web feed this morning. His projects are very interesting. I wish this post was Christmas-related, but oh well.

http://www.benheine.com/projects.php?dossier=72157623723956821

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Only two more finals left, dance and therapy. Then I have to pack my poor car, which will be literally packed. Then I have to clean my whole dorm, since my roommate had to leave unexpectedly. I hope I don't die, haha. Then HOOOOMMMMEEEE!!!! I'm going to sing along to Michael Buble's new album the whole way.

*I'll be home for Christmas....*

Proof

This semester and last summer have been really difficult. My focus has been pulled in so many different directions. It's hard to fight when you can't see your opponent, even though you know who he is. It's hard to pull it all apart and separate what God is telling you from what is just lies. It's also difficult to remember where you came from, what the condition of your soul was before all this happened. But that is one of the best things to do, despite how self-centered it sounds. Because it's not. It shows you what God has done for you and in you and through you. So, to that end...

There is one person in particular who, it seems, God has put in my life to test me and strengthen my apologetic skills. This person can be very difficult and stressful to be around. Two days ago we were having a pretty deep discussion, and when it became clear I didn't believe what they believe, they told me something that really should have gotten under my skin. But it didn't, because it was straight out of scripture. I'm sure this person was surprised at my reaction (or lack thereof, really), but inside my head I'm doing a little victory dance because WOW! 1 Corinthians 1:18 in action, baby! Aaaaah! It's so exciting when you get to live out what you believe and it WORKS!!! Thank you, Lord.

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Of the nine finals I have this semester, five are done. It's really weird not having to think about those classes anymore. (Brain, enjoy the break. You deserve it.). All I have left is the music therapy test, my viola jury, my singer's jury (I accompany on piano), and social dance.

Right now I need to go take a walk so I get energized to study and clean and pack! Pack. It's hard to believe I leave Friday and don't come back for a month.

I can't wait.

NYC in 24 Hours

Saturday morning, 4 am, I got on a bus filled with a class of first-years, a handful of kids in other years, the president of our school, two staff members, and two nine-year-old boys. It was packed.

We got to the Ellis Island ferry around 9 and took a whirlwind tour of the museum. We didn’t go to the Statue of Liberty, but it was still good. I was happy to realize how much of the history I remember. They also had a neat panel on the history of the banjo and accordion, which I studied a bit last semester. So props to my parents for choosing a great curriculum, and props to my university for being well-rounded.

 I am particularly fond of this exhibit with the ships. Yet another reason I should have been born in the 1800's.

 After looking for my relatives names on the wall (finding none that I recognized), we got back on the ferry, which took us across the Hudson to New York. We spent a little bit in the Bowling Green vicinity because our bus got stuck in traffic, then we ate lunch very quickly because we had a reserved time at the 9/11 Memorial.

By this time the security check count was two, and people who wore belts were beginning to get quite sick of it. Plus it was chilly. Anyway, when we got to the place our leader had been told to wait, we couldn’t figure out what to do. There were probably thirty of us, and we all walked down the street toward the memorial, only to get confused and walk back up to where we started, then find the signs that said yep, it’s the other direction, but when we got there they told us we were right the first time, so we ended up forming a line back where the bus dropped us off, and we were handed our tickets. I was quite impressed. That was the only miscommunication/poor planning episode that happened the entire time, at least to my knowledge.

The 9/11 Memorial was quite moving. I love the symbolism of the water falling down beyond where you can see. It was so impressive that my photographic creativity didn’t know what to do with it, so my pictures of it aren’t very exciting, but oh well.

When we left the memorial we had time to spare before the bus came back, so my little group went to check out Occupy Wallstreet. They had an event that morning at 10, but it had emptied out quite a bit by the time we got there. We did get to see the line of police vehicles (trucks, Chargers, motorcycles, the whole gamut) and a few Occupiers. I felt like we were witnessing history being made.

The U.N. held another security check, and I had to dump out my water bottle. Unhappy tourist, here. What was I supposed to do for the next seven hours before we got back on the bus? NYC is not like Australia. No free water stations.

But back to the U.N. I enjoyed it. We were given an audio tour (code for walking with big, first generation cellphone type device held to your head). One of the most interesting objects was the gun guitar. I like the ideal it represents of one day having no use for guns but turning them into guitars. It was also neat to sit in the council chambers where they talk for hours and come up with resolutions that carry oh so much weight, haha.

^^^I thought this was hilarious.

I’m sitting here trying to remember what we did after the U.N. tour. ....   .....    ..... ..   . .   . That seems like such a long time ago, but I’ve said that almost every week this semester. ...okay now I remember. It was around 4:30pm, and the bus was set to pick us up near Rockefeller at 10:30. So we had six hours to spend in New York, but not enough time to see a show. I was disappointed, to say the least. My group decided we wanted to go to Macy’s, Rockefeller Center, and I thought Central Park, but apparently that wasn’t the consensus. We never got there, but it was getting dark anyway. So, long story short, Rockefeller was incredibly crowded. It was like 2,000 people decided they wanted to play sardines! The tree was beautiful and very tall, which is good because I was holding onto a loop on this guy’s backpack to keep from getting lost. I never saw the rink, but that’s okay. I’d like to imagine it with a few less people skating so they have room to move.

It’s all jumbled up in my memory after that, but at some point we went to FAO Schwarz (“I promise the wait will be less than 15 minutes!” says the toy soldier running around outside), Times Square (smaller than I thought it would feel, bright but not overwhelming), Starbucks about 5 times(managed to get off without buying anything), the M&M store, and Roxy Deli (I got calamari, which has become a tradition for me when I eat while traveling. Sorry, NY, Cleveland still has you beat), and some touristy stores so we could warm up. We never could find directions to Macy’s, which baffles me, but we still had fun. 8:15pm came around and most of us were pretty much done, with nothing else we could think of to do, so we just went to Starbucks again and then hovered around the vicinity of the bus stop. Imitating the statues, quoting Despicable Me, being silly college kids who are trying very hard to not think about finals.

I was one of the first people back on the bus, quite ready to leave. It was funny hearing people’s comments as they got on. 95% said it was great but they would never want to live here and were glad to be going home. I can appreciate the city, and I could see why I would live in one, but I LOVE the country. I have the boots and the music to prove it.

One exciting thing that came out of the experience was getting to know my school’s main photographer. After she saw some of my pictures and we talked she told me I should meet the creative director here at school, so I have a meeting to set up with him after Christmas break. I’m excited, although I know a few people who are more talented than I am, by far, so it may just turn into a “hey, I know who you should talk to” meeting. We’ll see. Since music isn’t my outlet any more, I need another one!

I really need to post more often. It’s very helpful. I think my brain organizes itself more neatly when I do.

Well, time to sleep. I have one final exam down, six to go. Christmas is so close!

Follower

Apparently I am a follower of my own blog now. I'm not sure when or how that happened, but I think it's hilarious. Yes I do. I suppose if I am following myself it means I agree with what I say. Always nice. On the other hand, it might mean that part of me is always slightly behind the rest. This is also true. Sometimes it feels like it takes days for the slower part of me to catch up with the part that took the initiative to get out of that awful place it was stuck in last week.

Anyway, I am sitting here with an ice pack on my shoulders, trying to get them relaxed so I can sleep. This is another thing I should add to my list of things you can't do if you are a violist: you can't exercise your upper body in a strenuous manner unless you won't need to play for at least three days. You just won't play well. Your muscles will respond sooooo muuuuuuch sloooooower than normal, and it will frustrate you to no end.

NEWS FLASH!!! Switchfoot released a new album yesterday! I am so excited. I'm taking a break from orchestra music to listen to it right now.


Oh, if you want a listening excursion, play Glinka's Overture to Ruslan and Ludmilla. I feel like it was used for a commercial or something, and that's why it sounds so familiar.


Now I'm getting sleepy, so, goodbye.

New Music

Saturday we had our first orchestra concert of the season, which went pretty well, except for my walking on stage when I wasn't supposed to.  The orchestra played five pieces, but I was only in the first and last, and I apparently need to get more sleep, because I walked up there after intermission with the rest of the section. Thankfully the basses were still coming on stage so I slipped back off behind them. The viola section will be laughing about that for a long time.

Before we even played the concert they gave us the music for the next. That was slightly depressing. We barely got "the satisfaction and pride of a job well done" before we were given our next assignment! On the other hand, that is the most efficient way to handle it. No wasting rehearsal time handing out parts.

Yesterday I listened to a recording of one of the pieces, Glinka's Ruslan and Ludmilla. I recognized it immediately, and my heart sank. I had noticed when I got the sheet music that it starts out presto, but I didn't remember it was THAT degree of presto. Sigh. (Presto is the second fastest tempo marking, 168-200bpm, outrun only by prestissimo, more than 200bpm). I'll have to give my fingers caffeine injections.

My parents and sister came to the concert, but were surprised at how different the music was. This is interesting, because it didn't seem that unusual to me. If you have the time, could you please listen to these pieces and tell me how they sound to you? Are they hard to listen to? Do they sound like they have no center or base, or both? I've become used to listening to this kind of music, so I'm not sure how they sound to the casual observer anymore, and I would like to hear what you think.

Here are the pieces, composer then title:
Castellanos: Santa Cruz de Pacairigua
John Adams: The Chairman Dances (Foxtrot for Orchestra)

Thank you!

thxthxthx.com is a great idea. :)

This is from last semester, but apparently I didn't post it. How sad. :(

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I'm taking a break from cramming for my psych test. For the record, I hate cramming. I feel like I don't do as well when I cram as apposed to when I can steadily study up to the test. Unfortunately I couldn't do that this time. My other classes and such took precedence. And then I forgot about the test. There was a tiny but powerful explosion of frustration in my brain when I remembered. It hurt.

Actually I'm double-tasking right now. I'm listening to my Mozart piece that has 7 variations. That's the theme plus 7 more parts, which each have at last two sub-sections or things I'm supposed to change on the repeat, so let's total it, shall we? *mental math, scary thought* That's 16 slightly different ditties, and soooo many different ways to mix them up, which I so often do. I am attempting to solidify the proper order in my reluctant brain, and hoping for the best. If worst comes to worst, I'll just have to assign each variation a story. "This is the one with the bouncing bunny, which comes AFTER the marching band. But marching band can't play before the babysitter trying to catch the kid on the trampoline. It just can't happen". Yes, Willem Van Nassau. I'm turning you into a children's story.

I'm trying my best to make this fun. Truth be known, I'm excited I'll only be playing this piece for 7 more weeks. My other songs (you can skip this part with no hard feelings from me....as if I'd ever know....but anyway, this is more for my record and therapeutic exercise than anything) include Brahms' Intermezzo in E Minor, Opus 119 No. 2. I love it, and it doesn't have to be memorized. It's the romantic piece on my list. It's the last piece I play at the end of the day. It's gorgeous and passionate. It's emotionally draining, but entirely worth it.

Then there's the ever-present Bach piece. I actually like mine this time. It reminds me of a favorite quote of mine:"Well, Debussy's certainly made a hit with you," Said Simon, "though I'm not sure you wouldn't outgrow him. You're the kind of child who might develop a passion for Bach.

I told him I hadn't at school. The one Bach piece I learnt made me feel I was being repeatedly hit on the head with a teaspoon. --- from I Capture the Castle

I'm not sure I'm at the in love stage with Bach, but the relationship isn't quite as painful as it once was.

The last piece is a two-part Muczynski. The first part is really high on the piano, the second is extremely low. I'm talking lowest possible note low. On the second I'm supposed to picture the factory scene in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones. Hahaha, you've got to love a piano teacher who has her doctorate and  a golden snitch on her piano.

She Sighed

About the dearth of posts: It was an awful summer, especially after that post in June. Enough said.

About the title: She Sighed is a song title and it fits the day.
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I am not in the best mood and feel like I need to reinforce some personal quality that I like about myself. Yes, really selfish, so just skip this post. It's mostly for my own therapeutic use.

I can almost always find two ways to look at a situation. Take this: I've been so stressed that yesterday I  stripped my fingernails of their white-trimmed glory. This summer I really worked hard to resist damaging them, and I succeeded. Well, except for one nail here and there, but it was usually because I hit it and it broke. A small victory, but a victory nonetheless, and a victory I could see and touch and decorate.

Now it's gone, an addition to the mounting frustration threatening to cause some major change.

But there is a flip-side to this. Now that my fingernails are short, I won't be nagged by my teachers to cut them! They weren't actually getting in the way,  but my viola teacher was suspicious. This is one of the times I wish I was a vocal major. They can grow their fingernails out, style their hair down, and wear whatever clothes or jewelry they like (within reason). Not violists or pianists, no sir. We can't wear large rings, anything with a substantial collar or neck, earrings, watches, bracelets, the list goes on.


Whoops. I meant to turn that into a happy paragraph. Oh well. I'm still happy my teachers won't be able to bug me. There. Now I'm thinking positively again. :)

Assets and Targets

  

      For the last two weeks me and my sister have been playing viola in the pit orchestra for a summer music theatre’s production of South Pacific. It’s been exciting, challenging, and exhausting, but since most of the shows are at night, we have the days pretty much to ourselves. Unfortunately, the shows end at 11pm, which means I just start to wind down at midnight. My sister can fall asleep as soon as she changes out of her concert black, but I can’t. I haven’t quite figured out why this is, but it may be that I naturally sleep in if the night goes that long. It may also be that because I’m the older one, I have more responsibility in making sure everything is okay before I go to bed. I’m much more likely to wake up at a sound during the night than she is, and I think it’s because I feel responsible for her. I am,  and I fine with it, but I didn’t completely realize how different it is going from being a lone traveler to having someone dependent on you.
    This time with my sister has also made me realize how much of a home schooled country girl I was before I started college. Some of the adjustments she has had to make I also had last year, such as walking on sidewalks, weird as it may sound. Being a psychology geek, I want to take a side trip and dissect that action into sub-actions.
    First, we have the tactile sense: the feel of the concrete, how much traction your shoes have, how much push is required to walk.
    Second, vision: spotting holes, bumps, the edge of the sidewalk, or oncoming people or cars.
    Third, social: which side of the sidewalk to move to when passing a person going the opposite direction, what level of greeting to use if you see someone you know approaching (“Hi, how are you?”, “Hey”, or just a smile), what to do when a group of people is blocking the way, how close behind someone you can walk, and how to walk with a group of friends.
    And then there are little things, like what kind of walkway gets slippery when wet, and gauging how much time you have to cross the street before you get squashed like a little bug.
    That’s only the beginning. I won’t go into door-opening etiquette (which is different depending on where you live), or getting used to florescent lighting (igggg), and carrying a phone and key with you at all times (easily forgotten). But I will say that I really admire my sister for adapting so quickly and well to all that was thrown at her these past two weeks. As I type this, she is heading down to the gym BY HERSELF. Quite a big step considering she had to force herself to come here with me in the first place. It’s great for me too, because I got to be with her and have her as a roommate. Lots of talking and bonding time. I think we’re finally entering that stage people tell me about where siblings become best friends after years of friction. Thank You, LORD!
    I’ve been thinking recently about all the assets I have on my side. They are quite numerous when added together, and considering them helps to keep my focus on hitting the targets God has placed in my life. I tend to get discouraged when people and situations don’t change, especially when I see that the underlying issue is a case of ignoring God and trying to live without Him. I want to weep at all the wasted time and effort and grief Man goes through for naught.
    And then, like a bolt of lightning illuminating the face of the King of the Universe for all to see, one of His own shouts a praise that lifts the hearts of His children. This time, it was the girl who plays Nellie Forbush in South Pacific. My aunt came to see the show and told us that during the bows, the actress lifts her hands and says “Glory to God!”. She also references Psalm 104:33 in her bio.

    I love it when Christians are gracefully public in their allegiance to the LORD.
 It reminds me to do like the Newsboys song says: "Shine. Make 'em wonder what you've got. Make 'em wish they were not on the outside looking in". That's my target and I'm sticking with it.

Transitions

Freshman year: done.

Hold on while I go run around the lake a couple times in utter, joyous exhilaration. (Side note: it took me three tries to spell exhilaration correctly. *sigh* Apparently four days without school and I'm already losing knowledge). 

It strikes me how important transitions can be in certain periods of our lives. When a gradual transition isn't possible, the result is either high stress or a better result because I didn't have time to worry. So, how am I transitioning into summer?

By working, using up my hours in the conservatory office. I had three days at home before I was back at school, haha. It would have been nice to be at home this week, but I'm staying with one of the ladies from the office. She and her husband have a beautiful house beside a marvelous lake. To top it off, her husband loves to cook! I had a cornish hen, brown rice, and corn on the cob for dinner. Right now, I'm watching a cake show on TLC. I feel like I'm already on vacation.

The sad thing is that I'll only have one day at home before we're on the road again. Friday I work in the office, Friday night I work at a dress rehearsal for a dance concert, then I drive home for some sleep. Saturday morning my whole family leaves at 7:20 a.m. to go pack meals at church. After that we leave for the beach.

Hopefully sometime this summer I'll just...relax.

But why would I want that? Hahahahahaha.

Happy summer!

Poll!

Hello readers!

Please respond to the poll at the right. I'm really interested to see how it turns out. You can select multiple answers per person. Get everyone in your family to respond!

Thanks,

~Halifirien Pilgrim

On The Record

I'm taking a break from cramming for my psych test. For the record, I hate cramming. I feel like I don't do as well when I cram as apposed to when I can steadily study up to the test. Unfortunately I couldn't do that this time. My other classes and such took precedence. And then I forgot about the test. There was a tiny but powerful explosion of frustration in my brain when I remembered. It hurt.


Actually I'm double-tasking right now. I'm listening to my Mozart piece that has 7 variations. That's the theme plus 7 more parts, which each have at last two sub-sections or things I'm supposed to change on the repeat, so let's total it, shall we? *mental math, scary thought* That's 16 slightly different ditties, and soooo many different ways to mix them up, which I so often do. I am attempting to solidify the proper order in my reluctant brain, and hoping for the best. If worst comes to worst, I'll just have to assign each variation a story. "This is the one with the bouncing bunny, which comes AFTER the marching band. But marching band can't play before the babysitter trying to catch the kid on the trampoline. It just can't happen". Yes, Willem Van Nassau. I'm turning you into a children's story.


I'm trying my best to make this fun. Truth be known, I'm excited I'll only be playing this piece for 7 more weeks. My other songs (you can skip this part with no hard feelings from me....as if I'd ever know....but anyway, this is more for my record and therapeutic exercise than anything) include Brahms' Intermezzo in E Minor, Opus 119 No. 2. I love it, and it doesn't have to be memorized. It's the romantic piece on my list. It's the last piece I play at the end of the day. It's gorgeous and passionate. It's emotionally draining, but entirely worth it.


Then there's the ever-present Bach piece. I actually like mine this time. It reminds me of a favorite quote of mine:"Well, Debussy's certainly made a hit with you," Said Simon, "though I'm not sure you wouldn't outgrow him. You're the kind of child who might develop a passion for Bach." I told him I hadn't at school. The one Bach piece I learnt made me feel I was being repeatedly hit on the head with a teaspoon. --- from I Capture the Castle

I'm not sure I'm at the in love stage with Bach, but the relationship isn't quite as painful as it once was.

The last piece is a two-part Muczynski. The first part is really high on the piano, the second is extremely low. I'm talking lowest possible note low. It involves a ton of left-hand octaves, which are painful after more than twenty minutes I've found. On the second I'm supposed to picture the factory scene in Star Wars: Attack of the Clones. Hahaha, you've got to love a piano teacher who has both a doctorate and  a golden snitch, which she displays on her piano. My other favorite item on her piano is a little vase-type-thing with the inscription "Ashes of trouble students". It makes me smile.


Maybe I'll come back tomorrow after the psych test and write about my viola, chorus and accompanying music. 


Until later, adios! And Soli Deo Gloria!

LOV3

photo © 2011 Selena N. B. H. | more info (via: Wylio)
Three reasons why I love today:

1. It's sunny, it's warm, it's slightly windy, and I have a three-hour break between classes this afternoon! Wahoo!

2. I'm alive, and I had a great weekend with my family and roommate!

3. I got lots of little presents, including gluten-free cookies baked by one of the ladies in the office!

Watch my happiness be crushed by either music theory class or the results on my music therapy quiz. But no, this will not happen. I will REJOICE!

I Didn't See It At The Time

photo © 2010 Hartwig HKD | more info (via: Wylio)

Over the past couple of weeks I've been thinking about how many little things have happened to prepare me for what I am today. I want to compile a list in order to remember these things.

My mom worked in a daycare center before I was born. The other women who worked their made a book of songs, stories, fingerplays, crafts, and activities to use with young children. My mom didn't really use this when I was growing up, but she kept it all these years, and it's becoming increasingly useful for me in my music therapy classes.

Oma (grandma) and my mom and dad had tapes of children's, international and folk songs they played in the car with me. Knowing those songs cut the work in half for my beginning guitar class. And that contributed GREATLY to my not failing my other classes.

Papa gave me a little keyboard when I was really young. The musical impact that thing made is probably immeasurable. My parents bought a beautiful Chickering upright piano when I was around 7, and the rest is history.

The techniques I learned at the ballet classes my mom and dad let me take are being put to use this semester in my modern dance class. I feel like I'm eight all over again. :)
photo © 2007 chrisna herbst | more info (via: Wylio)
Next came the guitar, at the encouragement of my parents. I have a major head start on my music therapy major peers because of that. Mwahahaha. I got to play bluegrass and celtic music with the Washburne girls on the guitar. Some amazing, really good memories there.

My parents bought me The Fellowship of the Ring Extended Edition dvds for my 14th birthday. That and Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World lead to my fascination with movie scores, which brought me to a deeper love of classical music. That's one of the reasons why I started playing viola.


photo © 2009 mitch huang | more info (via: Wylio)

And playing the viola (thank you, Mom and Dad!) helps me in so many ways. For one thing, it is much easier to find a group to play music now. The piano is fun and a great instrument, but it's mostly used for solo performance, whereas the viola is rarely used that way. And I can tell you right now, I am definitely an ensemble person, hahaha. Orchestra is such a blast.

There is so much more, and hopefully I'll be able to connect all the dots in my mind and write about it later.

Soli Deo Gloria!

"I get down, He lifts me up/I get down, He lifts me up..."

That's the song that comes to mind right now. When I start to get overwhelmed by this semester, God brings along someone to cheer me up. I came back to school after being home for the weekend and my roommate had the flu, and now I'm getting it, but I'm sure something will happen to keep my spirits up. In fact, something already did, because campus was closed until 10 today. I didn't have to go to my 8:00am modern dance class, which was sad but nice. I still walked over there, not having checked my texts. So sad.
But still, I didn't have to move around.

There are so many things I need to do right now. Everything has homework. All 10 classes have homework. Hours of it. Interesting and good-for-me homework. Long and tedious and tiresome. Songs in foreign languages to memorize, abnormal psychology terms to import into brain, folk songs to learn, scales to write down, work study that involves more work than study, plain-old practicing, and things to mail! (Sorry Mattea, your letter really is coming. Truly.)

Looking on the bright side, I love my new roommate. She makes me tea :) and is very perky and fun. <3
Prayer answered the way I wanted it, haha. Thank You, Lord.

Wednesday is Cornerstone, the young adult Bible study. I'll be playing a Bali instrument named a Gamelan on Thursday night with the world music ensemble class I'm in. Saturday I'll be playing a nursing home gig with some of the music therapy students. So that's me at the moment.

*sigh*

Over and out